Best for special health

I’m fairly certain the androgynous Thai that just beckoned me in was actually male. I can’t be sure though. I’d have run if I wasn’t lugging my pack around: It’s my last day in Chiang Mai and I’ll shortly be boarding a bus bound for Chiang Rai. I wonder if these two towns are siblings?

Three French Type Is fill the next Massage Parlour I stroll by; it’s a shame as I was set on going there for a treat. There’s plenty to go around here – of everything in fact. And soon enough there’s another sign. It’s cheaper, which is a shame as I’m really getting a taste for haggling and enjoying the banter.

This parlour is slightly different; she also teaches classes and proudly displays a large plaque; “Thai massage certification”. Lying on the floor, she disappears for a while. A heavily built lady, middle-aged with a lazy right eye (possibly glass), and very confident; I’m a little worried at the prospect of allowing her to be unleashed on my legs.

Returning with a basket containing oils, gels, towels and utensils she kneels in front of me. The spinning ceiling fan above is bliss and so I close my eyes and let her begin. Thai massage seems to be a very pressure-orientated discipline. And in no time at all, she’s generating about as much pressure with her sausage-shaped thumbs as a crocodile’s jaw. It’s slightly excruciating and I’m thinking my left calf will need a few days to recover – I hope in time for my run around Chiang Rai.

Hearing a wooden rattle and looking down, I see her handle a stick, about 15cm long and pointed at each end; one fine, the other round. I’m quite ticklish and it’s difficult not to flinch and giggle as she runs it in between my toes and around the sides. More pressure; as the fine point is used for deep-tissue work. The only good thing about this part is the time in between the stabs; there’s some good relief.
Like a meat tenderiser, the other end of the stick serves as a chisel, as she hammers away at my heel. This is a little strange, and there’s half an hour more to go. Just like everything when travelling, however, it’s an experience and one I definitely recommend.

I suffer from ITB and the occasional spell of “Runner’s Knee”, which are both very common complaints. Stretches help and after each run I’ll rip through a set. Lifting my right leg and placing it over my left, she forms a triangle with my bent leg and the floor. Leaning over and holding my left leg, she pushes my right knee it as far as it’ll go toward my left shoulder – this is perfect for ITB. Limping as I leave, if it wasn’t for my dead left calf – this would have been an amazing 120 baht massage.